this entire week SUCKS. seriously fucking SUCKS. so many bullshit happened & i finally broke down just now. happily just now when i was talking to bestfriend wtf. dareld & no. 1 thought i was crying when i was actually sleeping. cause i haven't been having much sleep these few days. (can't sleep at all) sigh. the most funny thing was dareld actually went to take tissue paper & gave it to me. i stared at it like the paper was some beetle like that (ihatebeetles)
i've been watching bleach to distract myself but now it doesn't seem to be working. bleach doesn't want me to download it. fuck it. now i have nothing to distract myself. i can't do anything at all. i've also been trying to keep myself busy with school stuffs. doing every single thing just to keep myself really busy so i wouldn't think. even every single question in the worksheet & i realised it fucking pisses me off if i don't know one question. (like wtf it means) thank goodness, the MOST kind hearted boy (no.1) who claims to be in school team was there for me (he wanted me to write this down) plus he had a heart of GOLD.
under different kinds of stress. im a totally different person now. i guess even elson could tell, cause he was talking to me on the train today. he said certain things, now i understood what he meant. even no.1 could tell, IM DIFFERENT from the time he knew me. im a total changed person, no longer the cheerful dan that he used to know. oh man, i feel so emo that i want to go the toilet to emo now. if you can't stand this emo-ness. fuck off. just let me be emo for once.
it feels real good after crying badly on the phone (though it seems stupid). but, the feeling's still there. fuck it. seriously fuck it. it's that kind of feeling that you want to just rip your heart open & throw it on the floor and stamp on it. gaaa.
why can't certain people take things so personal & take it as a form of learning? that's what RP's learning all about, if you can't deal with it just fuck off from RP. seriously no point staying on if you can't stand it. you come & bombard me i understand & i don't really take it personally. but what pisses me off is that because of certain individuals they take my questioning so personally that when they question it's starting to affect my teammates too. that's the fucking thing that fucking pisses me off. you want to aim me CAN! it's alright. but you fucking affect my teammates it's fucking NOT OKAY.
& i love today's team members! team one <3 thanks guys (: i was so touched by what you guys said this afternoon to me. thanks (: love you guys! <3 & yes yes not forgetting no.1, he wants to be mentioned that his heart of GOLD is so huge that it can crush MacRitchie's monkeys & scare them all away -.-
p.s: YUAN DE SATEH SU TE NEH !
im really sorry baby, sorry. i just haven't been myself lately & i sort of guessed so, you too haven't been yourself either. it's just that so many fucked up things had happened. & i just can't take it anymore. so i just keep it to myself & unintentionally hurt you. now all i wish for is that 2 weeks to be over & everything would be perfectly fine im really afraid the same thing might happen again i do not wish for it to happen again you might not know what im talking about but i guess it's just the paranoid me that you know i am
please tell me it's all over imissyoubabe <3
10:13 PM
The Protagonist.
the leading lady
Cookie Monster, Them, Toilet Paper
DANIELLIA seventeen years old twenty-sevenJune1990 i like TOYS :D
Thankyous
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